Seriously?

It's tax season and I spent a little time with our accountant last Friday. After the meeting, I decided to add up all of our medical expenses for the year. My jaw dropped as it totaled over $11,000. That includes monthly premiums but, really? We could have bought a car. Or shared more. Or taken a few trips to visit Garett's family in Italy. Or saved for Wyatt's college education.
It's so disappointing to face up to the reality of our health issues. Most days I like to pretend that we're fine, it's fine and it's not a big deal. But, when my calculator tell me that we spent over $11,000 on insurance, doctors and medicine, I'm reminded of the significance that health challenges play in our daily existence.
Not a day goes by that I don't think of the impact of Behcet's on my body. It's usually in the first few moments of the day when I hear Wyatt saying, "Come, Mommy," from his bed and I'm wondering how long I can lay still before I need to get him. I also am reminded when my knees and elbows ache for no apparent reason and I have canker sores down my throat. Sometimes I just can't make it through the day and I call a friend to come over to be with Wyatt while I sleep, hoping to muster up enough energy to make it until Garett gets home.
I'm in the process of learning how to deal with life in new ways. It may be a life long journey. And, although I've walked this path for nearly 17 years, I'm struggling to get the hang of it. I love that God provides us with a community to walk alongside us and I am positive that I could not do it alone. I am also exceedingly grateful for the medical care that we do receive. There's a lot said about healthcare right now but I, for one, am appreciative of the excellent network of healthcare professionals who positively impact our quality of life. I only wish it cost a bit less. And that the pharmacist didn't know Wyatt and me by name.