The other morning Wyatt and I went to Boo Boo Records for their weekly sing along time. We've only been one other time but I think this may be my personal highlight of no longer working on Wednesdays. Heidi leads kids and their parents in a raucous good time. Towards the end of show she led us through Five Little Ducks. When we got to the part about none of the little ducks coming back Wyatt burst into tears. He was inconsolable through the next few songs, burrowing his head in my chest and sucking his thumb. After awhile the sadness passed and he enjoyed the last couple of songs.
I keep thinking about a few things. Wyatt is a boy who feels deeply and his tears were another reminder of that fact. A few weeks ago, the purple helium balloon he got at Trader Joe's floated into the sky while he was playing on the deck. For the following couple of weeks, Wyatt woke up every day talking about the balloon, making sad eyes and a disappointed sound as he remembered what happened to the balloon. When he would venture outside, he would lift both arms up to the sky and longingly look for the lost balloon. Yes, my boy feels deeply.
In addition to becoming more acquainted with Wyatt's sensitive nature, my first and most natural inclination was to tell Wyatt that he was okay. I think my intention was to quiet him down and also to help him get past the tears. As I've thought about it, I hope I'll respond a little differently next time. Who wants to be told, "It's okay," when the tears are really flowing? I sure don't. Those who are able to sit with the tears, listen to understand their source and then simply attend to the pain stand out in my world. I desire to be that kind of mom (and friend, wife, daughter, etc.).
After we get through the tears, it's helpful to remember upon whom to fix our gaze. A gentle reminder of this beats problem solving any day. I'm glad that God shows up at sing along.
2 months ago